For Always
by Cielita
Summary: **BOOK 5 Spoilers!** Rated for yelling and a little violence. Hagrid's thoughts as he runs from the grounds after he is sacked and McGonagall is attacked. Please R/R!


"For Always"  
  
Summary: The night Hagrid is sacked, Professor McGonagall is violently attacked trying to defend him. In the fray, Hagrid runs, not really knowing if McGonagall is alive or.well.you get the idea. Hagrid's thoughts as he stops to catch his breath.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of it! *sob!* The song, "For Always" was performed by Lara Fabian and Josh Groban for the movie "AI: Artificial Intelligence". In this context, the words just seemed to fit.  
  
"HOW DARE YOU!!" Hagrid shouted, hoisting his faithful dog, Fang up onto his shoulders, and running from his home. It was the most horrible thing he had ever seen. Four stunning spells at once for one defenseless woman. No warning had been issued, not one remark. They had simply attacked.  
Panting and fighting through the thick underbrush, Hagrid forced his huge form through the trees, breaking branches and frightening animals as he bounded through the night. Soon, the noise ceased and the night sounds returned. Birds and crickets chirped into the darkness. Hagrid stopped for a moment, leaning on an ancient tree for support. He wondered if he could have done something to help her. A wave of guilt swept him harder than the evening wind.  
"Oh, God, Professor McGonagall, I'm so sorry!" he muttered as he rested a hand on his thigh. His head was still spinning. The memory of what had just happened was burned into his eyes. He couldn't keep from seeing it over and over. She had endangered herself trying to defend him.  
  
Another wave of guilt flooded his soul as he stared into the trees, seeing it all again: the light from the door, her tall, narrow shadow as she ran, the red fire of the stunning spells and the eerie glow as they hit her. Then, the worst part, she hit the ground on her back and didn't move.  
  
"NO!" Hagrid shouted as though he were seeing it all again, "No! I won't let you hurt her! Stop it! It's not fair!" Somewhere in the back of his mind, he could hear her reassuring voice telling him that it wasn't his fault. Her thin hands, looking far too small because of his size, resting on his arm as she spoke. A sob worked its way up into his throat. Tears were forming in the corners of his eyes.  
  
"I close my eyes And there in the shadows I see your light You come to me out of my dreams across The night  
  
You take my hand Though you may be so many stars away I know that our spirits and souls are one  
  
We circled the moon and we've touched the sun So here we'll stay"  
  
Hagrid sat down on the nearest stump and began to cry. Not manly, small tears either. Large, heart-wrenching sobs that seemed to pour from his soul. He couldn't go back and find out if she was all right-he'd be caught. He couldn't bring himself to do what his heart wanted so much! What if? No! He refused to think that! Minerva McGonagall had been like a mother to him when his own mother refused to acknowledge him. Her love had meant the difference between life and death at times.  
  
"For always, Forever Beyond here and on to eternity For always, forever For us there's no time and no space No barrier love won't erase Wherever you go is to know in my heart You will be with me"  
  
He took a fleeting look back the direction he had come. It was plain to see with all the broken branches and twigs on the ground. His footprints would be easily seen too. A wet nose invaded the crook of his arm and Hagrid's thoughts snapped back to reality. Fang was awake. He stroked the dog's head and placed an arm around him as he struggled to catch his breath. He couldn't quit thinking about what had happened.  
"I want to go back!" he wept into the now howling night wind. "I wanna go back and give that awful woman a piece of my mind!" He stood now, feeling the tug of loyalty for his surrogate mother.  
"I want to go back and make sure that Professor..make sure that me.me mum is all right!" He was now blubbering again, much like a child who was lost and separated from his parents. It dawned on him soon after that he didn't even know where he could go for help. Was she still lying there, dying? It was all his fault! Hagrid turned and banged his fists the size of fruit baskets against the tree. It shook violently with the beating it was taking. Hagrid turned his eyes to the stars. They were distorted tonight-or was it his eyes? Faintly, he recalled a few constellations: Orion, the mighty hunter, and his favorite, Cygnus. He didn't know why this one was his favorite. As a student, he always liked swans because they were so graceful, even though not always the friendliest of creatures. Orion-this one was McGonagall's favorite. She liked the idea of the skilled warrior proudly holding his prey and she loved to look for hours at the breath-taking nebula in Orion's Belt. It made Hagrid feel better to know this. He recalled something Hermione had said to him once, "The ones we love never really leave us, Hagrid. They live on inside us for eternity through the good things they've done."  
Oh no, not again. He felt another sob rend his heart. He released it with tears that soaked his beard and drove in rivulets down his nose. He threw his head back, took a deep breath and howled into the stars; the howl of a man who had lost quite possibly his closest friend. He knew that Hermione had been right, but for some reason, it didn't make him feel any better.  
  
"From this day on I'm certain that I'll never Be alone I know what my heart must have always known That love has a power that's All its own!  
  
And for always, Forever Now we can fly! And for always, and always We will go on and on Goodbye."  
  
Hagrid took a fearful step away from the direction he came. He still wasn't sure that he had the strength to do this. He was going to leave her there. There was something about her confidence in him all these years that gave him what he needed to go on.  
"G-Goodbye, Momma." Hagrid murmured as he looked back. Fang whimpered softly beside him. He didn't know if he'd be back this way again, but whether he did or not, he knew that he would carry her with him forever.  
  
"For always. Forever. Beyond here and on to eternity For always and ever You'll be a part of me And for always, forever Although our tomorrows may crash the sky And for always and always We will go on And on.Goodbye!"  
  
With one last lingering look and a deep breath, Hagrid and Fang disappeared into the forest again. Profoundly saddened by their loss. 


End file.
